Monday, July 16, 2012

Anfang

It’s hard to know where to begin.

Blogging is nothing new for me, as I’ve maintained several over the years, mostly devoted to my costuming, art and fashion.  I’m no huge name in the blogosphere, but I have a decent number of followers and friends online and am part of a fairly large costume community. 
The average reader of my costume/art blog has no idea whatsoever of the sort of background I come from, and I’ve only just recently started talking about it a little bit on my more private livejournal.  Going on about my past doesn’t really fit with the tone or theme of my main blog though, not to mention my mother knows about and reads my current blog and the public posts on my livejournal, and I have NO desire for her to read this.
In many ways, I’m still not ready to have the very difficult conversations with my parents that talking about the past would involve.  And things get even more depressing when I think about the worst conversation of all which I’ll probably have to have with them at some point.  Namely, coming out to my very fundamental, puritanical parents.
I don’t use the word “puritan” lightly here.  My parents viewed the Puritans as heroes, and held their doctrines and writings on nearly the same level of infallibility as the bible itself.  My sister described their religious point of view in her blog here, which sums it up pretty well.  Looking at things broadly, the sole word “crazy” works equally well.
So.  Before I delve into introspection and religion and fundamentalism and homeschooling and patriarchy and family and… everything, I should probably set the stage a bit.
Me:
 Female.  Twenty-six years old.  Living on my own in Virginia where I work in the costume shop of a major living history museum.   Currently single, though not looking for romance as I plan/hope to move abroad next year and don’t want to be tied to anything here.  Have my BFA degree (majored in Illustration) and am applying to grad schools in the UK and Germany.  Am hoping to end up in Germany.  Homeschooled K-12.  Four siblings, an older sister and two younger brothers.  Very much the middle child.  Not exactly an atheist, I’d consider myself a “tooth-fairy agnostic” (google it).  Reincarnation makes sense to me, as does karma on a cosmic scale.
Okay then.  That done, it’s time to get cracking on actual content.  There’ll be a lot of looking back as I deal with the effects of my upbringing… though I imagine a fair amount of current struggles and hopes for the future will creep in.  Hopefully this blog will be a good thing, and will help me move on and gain perspective.  Guess we’ll see!
   

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